Where the Wild Things Are Trailer HD Quality

Where The Wild Things Are is a classic children's story published in 1963 by Maurice Sendak about a boy named Max whose anger leads him on an exciting (though somewhat dangerous) adventure.

In the book, Max's playacting leads him to wreck the house. As punishment his mother sends him to bed without supper. While in his room, Max angrily wishes he could leave. And he does. The angry boy-animal visits a jungle island inhabited by monsters, where he conquers fear (and common sense) and becomes king of all wild things. Though the position is fleeting, as Max soon becomes lonesome and homesick. He returns home to the comfort of his mother, who welcomes him with a hug and warm supper.

Over 40 years after the book was published, Spike Jonze directed a live-action, feature film based on this simple tale. In the movie, Max begins and ends his journey in much the same way. It's what happens in the middle that matters.

The movie adaptation features an in-depth profile of all of the wild things. They have names, personality and a back story of their own. Carol, the first wild thing to accept Max, is having a hard time dealing with the loss of K.W., his ambiguous love interest. Unable to cope with the change in his life, Carol throws violent tantrums pleads with the rest of the wild things to keep things the same. The hearty dislike for change is appreciated by Max, and the two journey throughout the wild island to unite the wild things and make everyone happy. But as Max soon discovers, it's not possible to force a happy ending.

Where The Wild Things Are is a surprising movie. It's dark, dank and deep. Your heart will beg you to call it quits, as you ache alongside Max, Carol and the rest of the wild things--but you won't be able to look away. The ending is neither happy nor a true ending. And emotionally you will feel unsatisfied. Critics have panned the movie for it's dark tone, though fans of the book, should appreciate the gritty display of emotion from a child's perspective.

Max Records is an amazingly talented actor. He has a firm grasp on reality and unbelievable facial control for such a young star. I look forward to seeing where he goes.

While I wouldn't watch Where The Wild Things Are daily, this single viewing has filled my head (and heart) with questions I am sure to ponder throughout the night and early morn. I rate it a Hot Dog Combo and look forward to adding this unexpected treasure to my DVD collection.

Panama - Sahara

Thor Trailer (OFFICIAL MOVIE TRAILER)

Thor is the next movie out by the folks at Marvel. 

They struck gold (or at least a high-grade silver) with the first Iron Man in 2008. Pissed off the Hulk. And feel so awful about the ending of Spiderman they're calling for a mulligan. 

Should they really be tampering with  

Thor, almighty God of Thunder? 

Want to know what I think?
----------------------------------------------------------------------------
1. Thor (Chris Hemsworth) looks like a cheap Brad Pitt.

2. Hemsworth has a terrible accent. It just doesn't sound right at all..

3. Thor is ridiculously petite. I think they scaled down Mjolnir to fit Hemsworth's well-moisturized hands.

4. Thor looks moisturized. Yes, Nordic peoples were rather clean, but he looks like he's been to get his nails done. Throw some dirt on the man.

5. What is Odin talking about with the whole "I'm trying to bring peace" speech? That has nothing at all to do with the Norse mythology. Warrior gods....honoring fallen soldiers....endless feast-war cycle...Respect the classics, man.

6. Soundtrack and set are not looking so hot. The music is out-dated, from an early 2000s action flick. The set looks like it was borrowed after they filmed The Chronicles of Riddick.
7. The All-Father sounds like a petulant child. Shouldn't Odin have a deep resonant voice......like Excalibur from Soul Eater, but less melodic. He had it for a moment right before turning on Loki...but then it just slipped away.
8. Is this going to be another Scorpion King?
9. Why is Thor holding his hammer like a limp noodle?
and
10. What is going on with that costume! Thor has an awesome get-up. Why did someone feel compelled to change it?

----------------------------------------------------------------------------

That being said the Thor video game teaser trailer gave me goosebumps. They managed to make Hacksworth look pretty cool.

Summer 2011, woo whoo!

Oh...Sega? 

Hmmm............

The final verdict on the lot? Stick of gum.Run while you can!

The Nightmare Before Christmas

In 1993, Henry Selick directed  The Nightmare Before Christmas. This bizarre, animated film was well received by critics and kids alike. It was welcomed as a diversion from the standard MiracleOn34thStreet/WonderfulLife/RudolphTheRedNose fare. And since then has sat quietly on the shelves of many DVD owners... for 364 days of the year.

Jack Skellington, the #1 celebrity of Halloween Town has grown tired of hob goblins and the Halloween hullabaloo. After seeking solitude in the forest, Jack discovers a secret passageway to another dimension. A world of light, gingerbread and snow known as Christmas Town. Eager to bring some ho, ho, ho to his ho-hum life, Jack returns to Halloween Town to spread the news. None of this sits very well with Mr. Oogie Boogie...better known as the boogie man.

The animation is crisp, the voice acting is passionate and the jazzy instrumentals are inspired. Not to be missed.

I rate it a Bucket-O-Food!

Partial Credits

Director: Henry Selick

Writers: Tim Burton, Michael McDowell and Caroline Thompson

Jack (singing voice): Danny Elfman 

Jack (speaking voice): Chris Sarandon 

Sally/Shock: Catherine O'Hara

Dr. Finklestein: William Hickey

Mayor: Glenn Shadix

Lock: Paul Reubens

Oogie Boogie: Ken Page

Santa: Edward Ivory

"I'm Going Ghost!"

A lot of cartoons get flack nowadays for their lack of concept and...well, cartooning. (Let's be honest. I'm one of the people giving flack.) But I bite my tongue when it comes to Danny Phantom.

David Kaufman voices Danny Fenton, the awkwardly pubescent son of ghost-hunting inventors Maddy and Jake. After a completely avoidable run-in with his parents' gadgets, Danny gains super powers which enable him to become invisible, fly and walk through walls. (Sure those are lame powers to start off with, but the kid does all right.)

Joined by his friends Tucker (Rickey D'Shon Collins) and Sam (Grey Delisle), Danny battles the ghostly forces of evil for an impressive 53 episodes. Director Butch Hartman shows admirable vision, cutting the show off the air before it became boring or annoyingly redundant. The show has a definite (and surprising) conclusion. Check it out for yourself on Netflix.

The characterization of adolescence is in line with American stereotypes. The cast oscillates between engaging and annoying throughout the series. If you skip a few episodes in the 3rd season you'll be fine.

The animation favors the popular Japanese style, but skips the face plants and sweat drops, taking advantage of simple lines and angular construction. The coloration and heavy shadowing makes for a palpable atmosphere that will have you jumping at shadows.

I rate it a POPCORN COMBO!

Danny Phantom Episode List on Wikipedia
David Kaufman: Danny Phantom
Nick Toons: Danny Phantom Games

Heartbeeps

In the mood for some mechanical mush? Then check out Heartbeeps. This early 80s film squeezes in next to other AI classics such as DARYL and Short Circuit with one exception-Andy Kaufman as an android.

If you're never seen the comedian at work then brace yourself for an hour and a half of painful awkwardness as Val (Kaufman), the lumber-savvy companionship bot, falls in love. Add to the mix, Bernadette Peters as Aqua the pool-side party droid and you've got yourself a movie.

The plot is simple if unusual: Two out-of-order androids embark on a mission to find out about trees. Their impromptu hike turns disastrous when two factory workers discover their disappearance and set out to reclaim the runaway merchandise. Meanwhile, a dysfunctional policing robot, the CrimeBuster Deluxe, joins the fray, determined to return Val and Aqua to their warehouse prison.


Heartbeeps has the right people. Kaufman and Peters work well together and still manage to add their signature traits to each role.

The film is dated, making it very difficult to take seriously. Despite the rampant silliness, there are several  moments (beautiful and philosophical) that should not be missed.

It's an excellent choice for your next 80s party or family movie night. I rate it a Popcorn Combo!

City of Ember

Jeanne DuPrau blends fantasy and mystery to create City of Ember, the first book in the Books of Ember series.

Built by the Founders, Ember was meant to be a temporary home. A place where their descendants could live until the surface world was safe. Leaving behind instructions to guide their children home, the Founders disappeared.

For 200 years the people of Ember have lived underground with no knowledge of their origins. The city survives by living off vast warehouses of food and supplies. Workers struggle to maintain the technology of the Founders, their only source of light. But with frequent blackouts and shortages of supplies the people of Ember are beginning to succumb to the darkness.

Explore the city through the eyes of Lina Mayfleet, a 12-year old laborer, struggling to find a better place for her grandmother and sister. A place beyond the chaos of Ember. With nowhere to turn and time running out, Lina accepts the help of former-friend and classmate, Doon Harrow. Together they race to decode a message from the past and save the city from itself.

The City of Ember is an easy-to-read chapter book best-suited for readers 10-17. While the vocabulary is not particularly challenging, younger readers may have some difficulty with the social and political concepts central to the plot. The slow pace of the story may cause some children to outright lose interest.

Despite their age both the main characters are complex. Their roundness makes them occasionally inaccessible and opaque. Similarly, their relationship with each other can be isolating for the reader. Due to this depth, the book will easily hold the attention of preteens and adolescents.

Although written for a young audience, City of Ember has a dark tone throughout. The first pages of the novel create tension and concern for a world that is falling apart. The physical darkness of the city streets is carried into the characters, particularly the Mayor and his attendants. DuPrau openly writes about starvation, social turmoil, death, political corruption and romance. Mature themes may be inappropriate for children reading alone. However, City of Ember provides an excellent companion book for class discussions of world hunger, overpopulation and social responsibility. The morality of the story, though evident, is not forced. And the final chapters leave much room for interpretation and discussion.

Consider reading the book as a family. The chapter breaks are evenly-paced making it easy to keep a regular reading time, however the cliffhanger sequences may keep you all up past bedtime.

Be sure to look for the movie adaptation, City of Ember (2008). The cinematic adaptation has a much faster pace, but remains true to the dark atmosphere and characterizations of the book.

Old Dogs

Dear Viewer,

Dan (Robin Williams) and Charles (John Travolta) have been life-long friends and business partners. With a big business deal around the corner their lives couldn't be further from perfect. They have the bachelor pads, the women and the cars. Only Dan seems  to think there might be more to life...

Throw in a long-lost love and a couple of kids and you've got yourself an adventure, my friends!

Old Dogs is a cookie-cutter family flick. The surprise plot is predictable. The problems are expected and the solutions seem too easy. If you were expecting a deep and moving dramatic piece...What were you smoking? This is simply not that kind of movie.

Safe, warm and simple as a blanket, Old Dogs will entertain for sure. There's nothing like watching a grown man being cradled by a gorilla or Robin Williams tripping on drugs to give you a fit of the giggles. Your kids are sure to love the slapstick and potty humor - even if you don't. And the ending, as satisfying as it is corny, reminds us that even if old dogs can't learn new tricks...people certainly can.

Besides with fewer options for the crowd stuck between watching the Lion King and Twilight, Old Dogs should be top of the list for any family movie night.

-Sylvia

P.S. This movie is a popcorn combo!

Revisiting The Last Airbender

Dear Viewer,

It seems Mr. Ebert had all of the words I did not. (The Last Airbender Review)


-Sylvia

P. S. This movie is awful! Check Nickelodeon.com for some great clips and episodes of Avatar: The Last Airbender.

Netflix pick: Sanctuary

Viewer,

It would be nice to say the Syfy show Sanctuary is something that could become a guilty pleasure.

It does star Amanda Tapping of Stargate SG-1 fame, she's easy on the eyes. It also stars Emilie Ullerup, who has the makings of a TV hottie of the highest order. But that's about it.

Guilty pleasures tend to have some dark humor, or social commentary or something. Sanctuary, to me, falls short.

Don't get me wrong the concept is a good one. Have a place where monsters of myth and legend can have a place to call home. Every episode means you can see anything from a mermaid to a lizard monster. Any fan of B-movies would love it.

In theory it's a great idea. It's the application that seems a bit off.

Now I can understand bad special effects on a TV show; budgets aren't high and time frames are short. But I get the feeling the producers didn't give the audience credit for knowing what a fake fire elemental would look like. Each set seemed to be a 3-D work in progress, with the actors working in front of a green screen every 3 minutes.

The acting is wooden, which can be attributed to a new cast working together for the first time. That should improve over the course of a season. But after watching the first three episodes, I wonder how many fans should have the patience to keep watching.

Apparently enough people kept watching for Syfy to renew the show for a third season, which means the initial headaches the show gave me would disappear over time.

Or people just need an excuse to look at women in tight plastic suits.

Whichever.

-Paul


P. S. This series is a box of candy.

Scott Pilgrim vs. The World

Dear Viewer,

If you waited in line for tickets to Watchmen or kicked your rear catching the midnight showing of Kick Ass, then whip out your plastic and head to Fandango.com you are going to want tickets to see SCOTT PILGRIM VS. THE WORLD.

Michael Cera stars as Scott, the underachieving Canadian bassist, whose life gets turned upside down when he meets Ramona Flowers (Mary Elizabeth Winstead).

As if struggling to dump his underage Asian girlfriend isn't hard enough, Scott soon finds himself in the midst of an epic battle against the League of Evil Ex-Boyfriends. The prize--Ramona. 

The best video game/comic book movie since The Dark Knight (2008), Scott Pilgrim has it all. With plenty of romance, rock and action this movie is sure to be a hit. Gamers, look forward to the references to 8-bit classics. Parents, watch out--some of the jokes are gosh-darn racy. This is definitely a mature PG-13 flik.

-Sylvia


P. S. This movie is a Hot Dog Combo! Yum.

Be sure to check out:

• The Complete Scott Pilgrim Series by Bryan Lee O'Malley
• I Love You, Man (2009)
• Nick and Norah's Infinite Playlist (2009)
• Pineapple Express (2008)
• The Incredible Hulk (2008)
• 8-Bit Theater on Nuklear Power.com--A sure laugh for any Scott Pilgrim fan.

Netflix Pick: No Impact Man

Viewer,

Imagine if you will a man who was willing to forgo most common comforts for the sake of improving the planet. How would he do it? Go on a pilgrimage maybe, search for answers on the top of a mountain?

No, he does it by cutting off his electricity in lower Manhattan.

That's the story of No Impact Man. A documentary filmed in 2009 and available on Netflix.

Colin Beavan was a writer of non-fiction and Internet blogger when the idea hit him to decrease his environmental impact to zero.

Not lower it, like a credit score. Not like cholesterol, no, he wants to make no impact on a struggling eco-system. Pun intended.

To his credit he does it incrementally, first changing the way he eats, and buys food. It is a gradual growth he undertakes to change his life.

Problem is, he's married to a pop-culture/coffee junkie and has a young baby while living in one of the most populated and cosmopolitan centers on Earth.

The story of Beavan and his family is an engaging one, with small lessons about how to be better for our environment sprinkled throughout.

While it is important for the question "how much consumption is too much consumption?" to be raised. It also, without trying, makes you wonder who else could do this but someone with enough money to shop at a farmer's market, or go to upstate New York and go directly to a farm to get real milk.

And should someone undertake that kind of transformation when they have a baby on board?

It's definitely a conversation starter, the kind of movie that starts good debates and some self exploration. It's also the kind of movie that makes you feel bad for the bottle of water you're drinking.

-Paul

P.S. This movie is a Popcorn Combo. Give it a look.

Ahvahtahr Ahng, we need you!

Viewer,

You don't have to go far to read a poor review of The Last Airbender.

As the first live-action adaptation of the popular Nickelodeon series, Avatar: The Last Airbender, many people had high hopes for this film. However, it seems that fans and critics alike have slammed the movie for poor casting, poor acting, rushed plot and blatant racism.

Die-hard fans of the series are furious at the absence of key characters and background story. M. Night's groupies are sure the fault lies anywhere but on an egotistical director/writer.

Reviewing the movie as it stands....most of the complaints are still valid. (To save time, I'm just going to discuss the script.)
 
This movie has a lot to convey. In 103 minutes, we're covering the entire first season. At 20 minutes a show, and 20 episodes total, that's 400 minutes of plot. Even if you cut out time for filler and non-essential asides you still have several hours of information. The script of this movie simply does not do justice to the amount of source material.

The areas of plot which require the most explanation are eerily silent. Explanations of interesting concepts are cut short, as if the movie were trying to reach an even younger demographic than the original Nick crowd.

The dialogue is stilted and unbelievable. The characters speak as if they didn't live in their world. ("Yes we have a very spiritual place", "we could be friends you know", "may I introduce you to the mysterious ocean and moon spirits?")

The conversations between characters do little to convey a sense of the social hierarchy or cultural traditions that brought the show to life. Adults speak to children as if they were on equal ground. The lord of the fire nation speaks to his generals casually during times of war and turmoil. Honestly, what boss spends that much time listening to an employee complain before thinking "I hired you to take care of stuff....why can't you do it?" Not mine!

As a movie on its own, The Last Airbender it's AWFUL....as a live-action representation of an animated show it's worse than my humble vocabulary can hope to express.

M. Night must be the Ahvahtahr himself. I certainly feel subdued by all the elements....

-Sylvia

P.S. This movie is a stick of gum. SKIP IT. Or get it on DVD and stage your own Mystery Science Theater special from the couch.


In case you still aren't sure whether you should watch this movie, I listed a few other complaints....
1.    There is no main character. You don't care about anyone because you don't know who they are or where they are coming from. There is no emotional connection.
2.    There's no comic relief. (Unless you count the people coming out of the ground with drill bits on their heads...it was funny that we were supposed to take that seriously.)
3.    The race criticisms are legit. Eastern-looking characters are evil. The good guys are Caucasian. M. Night's explanation doesn't show a relation to the show or social commentary. The original show was pretty clear about the physical attributes of each nation. They were all identifiable races.
4.    None of the kids act like kids. Aang doesn't act like Aang did in the first season.
5.    Zuko has no noticeable scar tissue. A little odd for a character whose scar tissue is one of his defining physical and psychological traits.
6.    The characters lack interest in their own story. How about the scene where we all stand still and watch someone kill the spirit of the moon? Why didn't anyone do anything?
7.    "He's making fire out of nothing!?" Why would other firebenders fail to understand the concept of personal body heat in its relation to fire? It is clearly stated in the show that this is a fundamental lesson in the world of firebending.
8.    "Show them the power of one"? Why would the Avatar guide be on a power trip? Sounds a little unbalanced...
9.    The monks NEVER tell him he can't have a FAMILY in the show. Why would this be added to the script? At best it sounds like a misinterpretation of the GURU episode. At worst it is a harmful revision that will alter the entire process of becoming the Avatar.
10.    Most of the movie reflected the activity of the first and last two episodes. But the content of these scenes is lost in the movie representation. The humor and confusion of Aang's awakening and the fear and anger of that final battle in the North is nowhere to be found.....

Come on...Why not save yourself the trouble and watch the real AVATAR at work. Check YouTube.com or Nickelodeon.com for some great clips and episodes. Or buy it today on Amazon.com.
 

Netflix Pick: Farscape

In March of 1999, a quirky sci-fi show went on the air in Australia. It told the tale of an American astronaut thrown in with a band of escaped convicts aboard a living ship. After four years of misadventures and hours of puppeteering, the group had managed to traverse the universe and gain a (small) but loyal fanbase.

Although some begrudge the worth of Farscape, there's no denying the mark it made on the sci-fi community.

There's also no denying the formulaic nature of the program. There have been and will always be shows about space exploration, loss, being a fugitive, and little alien men in hover chairs; but few are as entertaining as Farscape. Don't get me wrong-the show is all kinds of cheesy but it does have merit.

If you like Star Trek: Deep Space Nine or Babylon 5, then Farscape may be for you.

Give it a look.

Rocky loves Emily, Rocky loves Emily!

Get ready for some rockin' retro action with 3 Ninjas.

When international weapon smuggler, Hugo Snyder, seeks to expand his business he draws too much attention from the FBI. Looking for a quick fix he hunts down his old ninjutsu instructor and partner Mori Tanaka.

But Master Tanaka has new pupils in his grandsons, Rocky, Colt and Tum-tum.
Three young warriors-in-training receive their first field test when Grandpa refuses to join forces with Snyder.

If you're nostalgic for Twizzlers, bleached denim, and floral prints then pick up a copy of this classic 90s flick.

I rate it a popcorn combo! HIYA!

The Ant Bully

If you're looking for a feel-good, family flick give the Ant Bully a try. Lacking the budget and hype of the current cinema fodder, the Ant Bully was quietly received by the masses. (No doubt because we are all still reeling from the mediocrity of Bugs' Life, Antz and Bee Movie.)

The Ant Bully tells the story of Lucas, an under-sized kid with over-sized problems. Dealing with a bully of his own, Lucas takes his aggression out on the ants in his yard. Little does he know, his antics have wreaked havoc in the insect world earning him the title of the Destroyer. Terrified at the prospect of the next disaster, the ants take matters into their own hands...

Zach Tyler Eisen (Avatar: The Last Airbender, The Backyardigans) does an excellent job as the voice of Lucas Nickle standing up against Julia Roberts, Nicolas Cage, Meryl Streep, Paul Giamatti, Regina King, Bruce Campbell, and Lily Tomlin. The animation is fluid and interesting, though the score is uninspiring.

I rate it a Popcorn Combo!

P.S. Check out Zach Tyler's television voice work on Avatar: The Last Airbender.

The Lost Boys 2: The Tribe

Despite the belief of half the teen population, vampires are no new craze. Long before the Cullen teens made fangs gay, adolescent blood suckers were tearing up a quaint little town called Santa Clara. (That would be The Lost Boys, if you haven't figure it out yet...)

Although Keifer Sutherland is sorely missed, Angus Sutherland steps up as Shane the leader of the Santa Clara vampires. His performance is believable though the surfer boy act gets a little old. (Hey, at least he doesn't glisten in sunlight.)

Facing down the clan, Chris (Tad Hilgenbrink) struggles to keep his sanity while protecting his younger sister. Not that he's alone, Online Reverend Edgar Frog (Corey Feldman) returns to the scene with years of hunting experience and a bone to pick.

If you liked the first movie, give part 2 a go. It won't wow you with special effects or phenomenal acting but it's sure good for reminiscing about the vampires of yore. You know...the ones who kicked serious a$$.

I rate it a box of candy.

I ain't afraid a no ghost!

Bringing Ebonics to the lips of paranormal professionals everywhere, Ghostbusters is a cult classic not to be missed! This New York-themed, action-comedy follows the birth of a ghost hunting agency from conception to reception (that's a party for those readers behind on the hip lingo). Although not big on the frights, Ghostbusters never falls short of laughs. Mostly because no one stops to consider good taste.

Indeed, it seems as if Dan Aykroyd, Bill Murray, Harold Ramis and Ernie Hudson were given free reign to ad-lib as desired. The script always seems natural, with each actor truly owning their character. (Although, this reviewer must admit "the Black Ghostbuster" could probably be replaced without drawing much notice.)

Excellent writing, set work, music, and plot, Ghostbusters has all the trademarks of an unnaturally good movie. Buy it, borrow it, barter it-just get this movie into your house immediately!

Definitely a bucket o' food!

Penelope

Penelope presents a refreshing take on a classic theme. Set in England, this modern fairy tale tells the story of a young woman cursed. Doomed by her ill-mannered ancestors, Penelope is born with the nose of a pig and one chance at breaking the spell. "Only when one of your own kind claims this daughter as their own will the curse be broken." (Could you ask for a better set up?)

Christina Ricci (Casper, Sleepy Hallow) does justice to the part with soft-spoken wit and believable naivete. James McAvoy, Reese Witherspoon, Peter Dinklage, and Richard Grant round out the rest of the main cast. You're sure to find brains and brawn in this bunch of characters.

However, Catherine O'Hara (Beetlejuice, Home Alone) steals the show. Her typical over-the-top charm and shrill tone hits you from the opening scene. Don't sit too close to the screen, you might take a swing at her.

Although you'll be glad you skipped it in theaters, this delightful piece is sure to make a welcome addition to your home movie collection.

I rate it a hot dog combo!

Ninja Assassizzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz

Ninja Assassin slipped its way onto DVD last month. It's no surprise you didn't hear anything about it, this movie was AWFUL.

Korean pop sensation Rain, stars in the film as trained assassin Raizo. Adopted as an orphaned child, Raizo was initiated into the Ozunu Clan through his ninja training. After a falling out with his master, this young ninja embarks on a journey to free himself from the clan and rectify the mistakes of his past.

Although short on plot and acting, this movie had no shortage of unused talent. Most of the main characters have shown some serious acting ability in other films. Naomi Harris (Tia Dalma from POTC, and Selena from 28th Days Later) plays a dedicated detective and secondary love interest....badly. Aside from poor scripting, you'd think a girl used to warding off zombies would know how to look suitably terrified during a ninja attack.

Randall Duk Kim is no stranger to the stage and has done plenty of voice acting and supporting roles. Remember the key maker in the Matrix series? Yeah, that older Asian guy on the back of a motorcycle with Trinity...He's the bad guy! Slapping kids' feet and giving dire speeches over dinner, Duk Kim does a fair job of having a personality but falls short of any kind of depth. (but I can't be too mad...he played my favorite character in Disney's Kung Fu Panda!)

Anna Sawai, the beautiful female ninja, escapes my scathing remarks. Not because her acting was good, it was just as bad as the rest. (Cornier than corn.) This young actress is new to the silver screen and probably did it for fun. (Who wouldn't want to work with pop sensation Rain!) So I'll give her a pass and the benefit of the doubt. Good luck with your next film, Ms. Sawai!

Overall, Ninja Assassin has failed to meet my expectations. If you want to see an entertaining Kung Fu flik I suggest you check out something by the always amazing Jackie Chan. (Who Am I? Drunken Master and Rush Hour are all great choices.)

If blood is the payment for shame, Ninja Assassin is going to need a transfusion!

I rate it...a stick of gum!

Night at the Museum 2: Battle of the Smithsonian

Are you still a Stiller fan?

Then buckle up and get ready for a wild ride! The second movie in the Night at the Museum series makes its way to DVD December 2009! (Okay, so I'm a little late. Even the professionals let one slip every once in a while.)

Having stopped the theft of the golden tablet and rescued the living exhibits, Larry leaves his post at the Museum of Natural History to pursue his dreams of inventing. From the un-losable keys to the glow-in-the-dark flashlight, Larry gives the late Billy Mays a run for his money.

But with success comes sacrifice, and he looses touch with his friends.

Distracted by an upcoming corporate mergers and sales projections, Larry swings by the museum to find everyone is prepped and packed, ready for transport to the National Archives in Washington D.C.!

With ANOTHER bad guy trying to steal the golden tablet and even cornier jokes, this movie is at best watchable. Unlike the first movie, Battle of the Smithsonian has no plot and no familiarity. Even the whole "exhibits coming to life" bit seems old hat.

Night at the Museum 1, like a number of my favorites (Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles, Ghostbusters, and Home Alone 2), was a movie about New Yahwk.

It was about the museum we remember visiting as kids, and intending to visit as adults. The exhibits that are duplicated a million times on Facebook. (EVERYONE thinking they've got the best shot of the hanging whale or the fossils.)

All things considered Night at the Museum 2 does not live up to expectations. The effects were neat and Hank Azaria's lisp will make you giggle, but you will probably be able to live without wasting the time.

I deem this a.......Box of Candy!

-S

Hulk and his Planet.

Get ready for action-packed adventure as your favorite green giant smashes onto DVD. Based on the Marvel story arch, Planet Hulk follows our hero after his exile from Earth. Betrayed by his fellow superheroes for fear of his power, Hulk hurtles through space and in a fit of rage (IRONY!) destroys his own ship crash-landing on a planet torn by war.

Thrown into an arena he doesn’t understand and alongside companions he doesn’t trust, Hulk is up to his usual smashing and bashing, with a political twist. Is the king a tyrant? Is Hulk the savior of millions? If you can put up with an hour and a half of roars and green blood you’ll find out!

If you were expecting to see the Hulk struggling to come to terms with his inner demons, look elsewhere. If you are hungry for hand-to-hand combat in an intergalactic Roman Coliseum, for you…HULK SMASH!

That is not to say the movie is bad. It is not. Gather a few buddies, and maybe that one girl who likes comics and you’ll have a good time. The animation is sharp, and the action is spot on. This movie follows the comic book faithfully but fails to convey the same urgency and dynamic characterization of the Hulk.

Watching Bruce Banner’s alter ego develop from an angry child into a great king is supposed to be the focus of the story. He even gets a girlfriend, and some real friends. He learns that he isn’t the only one to spend his life being mistreated. (That can be a bit of a wake up call.)

You don’t get any of that from this film.

You do get some awesome cameos from Thor, the god of thunder, and his alien sword brother, Beta Ray Bill. And you do get to see Hulk wield a sword. Which is like…cool.

Overall, Marvel fans won’t be too upset with this film. And everyone else won’t miss the plot elements they didn’t know to look for.

Give it a look.
P.S. This movie is a popcorn combo.

Extract: Pure Comedy

Dear Viewer,

They say you should write what you know. Record the stories in the everyday as if they were extraordinary and they will become so. The master of this is writer-director Mike Judge, best known for Office Space, King of the Hill, and Bevis and Butt-Head Do America.

His latest piece, Extract, is about growing up. Not the transition from childhood to adulthood, but the much more difficult shift towards recognizing and accepting things as they are.

Your big house might be too big.

Your lovely wife might not be so lovely.

Your best friend might be an idiot.

And that job, the one that you complain about everyday, the one that keeps you up late and out early, the one that gave you all those grays, just might be the most interesting part of your day.

None of the acting in this film is phenomenal, but it is believable. Jason Bateman’s incredulous stare and hunched shoulders bring life to the humdrum existence of Joel Reynolds. Add to that the natural sex appeal of Mila Kunis, the familiar beauty of Kristen Wiig, and the blank stares of Dustin Milligan and you’ve got yourself a story!

The plot is as shallow as the characters. In fact you might forget their names half-way through. And don’t expect to be saved by humor (are the people in your life all that funny?).

When you break it down, this movie really isn’t all that great…but once you start it you will keep watching. Crossing your fingers and hoping things work out for Joel. That maybe this story will show you the secret to accepting life’s hardest truth, how to come out alive.

P.S. this movie is a Popcorn Combo

G-Force, GO! (Seriously...)

If you're in the mood for an action-packed, espionage featuring small rodents, G-Force is the movie to see!

Perfect for families this movie has a little bit of something for everyone.This Disney flick received a very warm welcome July 09, the latest in a series of somewhat experimental 3-D films, G-Force often feels like a theme park ride. With extended chase scenes and large explosions, viewers are sure to be entertained even if the 88 minutes of one-liners fall flat.

The movie follows the story of the leader of the team, Darwin (voiced by Sam Rockwell), as he struggles to prove the validity of using animals as FBI agents. Darwin is accompanied by a Hispanic guinea pig, Juarez (Penelope Cruz) and a painfully Black rodent, Blaster (Tracy Morgan). After having their funding pulled by the FBI, the team crawls their way to the top, facing every danger known to rodent kind, from pet stores to stray cats. There is little depth to the characters, as most of the screen-time is taken dumbing down an already simple plot for pint-sized audiences. But remember there will be explosions! (And a couple of chase scenes that are sure to tweak your interest)

There is of course, a neat Disney bow on the ending, with the mission's success and closure for each character.

I found G-Force vaguely reminiscent of Small Soldiers (1998) and The Mouse and the Motorcycle (1986). The CGI was pretty cool, the micro-technology was surprisingly believable, but the movie lacked the substance and heart of a true classic.

So, expect a few laughs, a guffaw or two, but don't get your hopes up.

And remember...

"We are the Commando Elite. Everything else is just a toy!" (Chip Hazard, Small Soldiers)

You'll need wite-out to fix Whiteout...

Dear Friend,

After sleeping off the afternoon and a quickly fixed dinner of leftovers, P decided it was time for a movie night. It's been a week at least since we've seen something new. It's one of our more normal past times.

But due to my current streak of intolerable moodiness, P was left to pick the flick. This week's entertainment: Whiteout.


They should have named that movie "EVERYONE OUT"!

The usually classy Kate Beckinsale steps behind the badge of the cliche jaded cop. Toning down her vampiric flare, British accent, and acting talent, Beckinsale left us all in the cold as she stumbled around the Antarctic wilderness searching for a killer.

The whiplash-inducing plot begins with the discovery of a body...in Antarctica. US Marshall Carrie Stetko (Beckinsale) due to an overdeveloped sense of duty, runs willy-nilly trying to solve the mystery-which of course delays her impending retirement. Despite years of training and experience, Stetko throws herself into a string of ill-advised activities. After the frostbite and 20ft fall, even the most adventurous viewer will begin to question the character's practicality.

Adding to the lack of believability, a recycled score, and poor scripting make this movie almost unwatchable. (I'm pretty sure all that kept P watching was the hope of further nudity-look out for the shower scene within the first ten minutes....)

However, the untouched purity of the white desert is also a good reason to keep watching. The sharp style of cinematography captures the simple beauty of the snowy plains and crisp edges of mountains. At the same time justifying the repeated warning that "nature did not want anyone to survive Antarctica".

If you are inclined to enjoy slow-moving, poorly-scripted murder mysteries, by all means watch Whiteout. You'll be in for an enjoyable night.

For the rest of you, trust that this film will bring you on an exciting journey......at least as long as the previews last. Perhaps you'd prefer to check into the director's other work. Dominic Sena is better known for his work filming Janet Jackson. At least if this isn't your style it will be over before the popcorn gets cold. (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=LvMpBlyKlfo)

-S

The Concession-Stand Critiques

Dear Movie-Watcher,

So you know that feeling after going to the theater and watching a REALLY bad movie…that feeling of regret and sadness…not for the waste of time but for all that darn money you spent on food. ($20 per person for a soda and bag of popcorn. And that’s ON TOP of the $15 ticket and $5 3D surcharge.)

We’ve invented a rating system that speaks to that frustration-get ready for the Concession-Stand Critiques! (CSC)

Stick of Gum - Not a pack. A STICK. This movie was so awful you are bemoaning the loss of 6 cents! Skip it!

Box of Candy - A movie has to be pretty awful for you to regret a $2 box of candy. It’s okay, and you’ll probably get over it soon. But is it really worth the stress? Consider your other options!

Popcorn Combo - With the economy being what it is, that $12 combo of soda and popcorn isn

’t such a hot deal. Not to say that popcorn isn’t delicious! I mean for the 10 minutes that it lasts during the previews that warm theatre delicacy is sooooo worthwhile. As P would say “Give it a Look.”

Hot dog Combo – You know that smug look you give the pimple-faced cashier as you order the HOT food combo! It’s REAL food…sorta. With a hot dog in one hand and a big-a$$ soda in the other you will sit through the film full and happy. No regrets. It’s going to be a good time!

Bucket-O-Food - Bring a bucket! You’re going to need it to haul all that crap into the theatre. Mothers trying to get their children to share a single popcorn will glare as you pass by with the Bucket-O-Food, Every theatre has one. That diarrhea inducing combination of candy, soda, popcorn, hot dogs, nachos, cheese, and ice cream. But don’t give it a second thought. This movie was AWESOME! You are so satisfied you threw away that $200 receipt and twittered as you walked out the door. You might want to go back and watch it again with a (rich) friend. Did you pre-order the DVD yet!

There you have it! The Concession-Stand Critiques!

Just to get you familiarized here are some of the movies in my collection with their CSC stamp.

He’s Just Not That Into You - Box of Candy!

What Dreams May Come - Hot Dog Combo!

Public Enemies - Hot Dog Combo!

The Goods - Stick of Gum!

Dirty Jobs Collection 1 - Bucket-O-Food!

Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles - Bucket-O-Food!

Planet Hulk - Hot Dog Combo!

Sky Captain and The World of Tomorrow - Stick of Gum!

Max Payne - Stick of Gum!

Thanks for reading and happy watching!